Timothy McSweeney writes about his family summer vacation at Burning Man.

Instead of our normal trip to Grandma’s in Oregon, our parents drove to the Nevada desert for Burning Man. Mom and Dad explained that their relationship was in a rut, and they wanted to try something new. Mom said that Dad isn’t spontaneous anymore. Dad complained that Burning Man tickets are more expensive than a week at Disneyland, but Mom said that the drugs are better here.

We got here in the morning. The car broke down, so Dad traded it for a sheet of stamps that had Woodstock on them. Mom and Dad ate some of the stamps, and Mom changed into a tie-dyed dress. Dad said he was tripping, but I think he’s walking fine.

I’ve come to the conclusion that BM is just too far out of my comfort zone. I don’t even like camping.